keevacaereni: (oh crap)
keevacaereni ([personal profile] keevacaereni) wrote2011-02-14 01:04 am
Entry tags:

Ganked from anactoria, for a change

Pick a paragraph (or any passage less than 500 words) from any fanfic I've written, and comment to this post with that selection. I will then give you a DVD commentary on that snippet: what I was thinking when I wrote it, why I wrote it in the first place, what's going on in the characters' heads, why I chose certain words, what this moment means in the context of the rest of the fic, lots of awful puns, and anything else that you'd expect to find on a DVD commentary track.

Re: Because I need to do something else other than bloodrunsclear related bitching and moaning...

[identity profile] keevacaereni.livejournal.com 2011-02-14 11:14 pm (UTC)(link)
She lets herself into Nella's room and turns on the light. Nella quiets immediately, blinking in the light from the bare bulb above. She waits patiently as Chick makes her way over to her, restrained to the bed by a chain and collar. Chick can see the welts on her neck. The sight makes her grin.

I love writing Nurse!Chick, as you can probably tell. She's so twisted, it's so much fun.

When Chick reaches her, the look in her eyes is that of a scared child. "The ponies came back. They rode around and around and up and down and over me, and the hooves bruised me. Look!" She holds out her arms, but they are clear of marks.

Nightmares have always fascinated me. Dark horses with flaming eyes and flaring nostrils...They're pretty interesting. And they happen to fit Nella very well.

The first brush against her skin marks her red, and there's the first blush of a blister when Chick runs her hand over the area. She moves to Nella's chest, dropping a kiss to her breasts before drawing the rag down her sternum. Nella screams.

Her burning skin catches the light like the last gasp of the dusk."


I actually did research to find the right kind of chemical for this. Silver nitrate's used to cauterise delicate wounds like arteries. The prompt gave me the idea for burns, and fire is so inelegant.

Re: Because I need to do something else other than bloodrunsclear related bitching and moaning...

[identity profile] ladyhadhafang.livejournal.com 2011-02-14 11:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Nice to hear your insights on this. Especially the nightmares bit. :)